All Star Game recap: Let me beat the NY Post

For those of you who watched or read about the MLB All-Star game, my prediction for NY Post Headlines:

“Dan Uggly”

“Uggla Finish”

“Ugg(la) – National League Loses Again”

“Fuggla!”

Whoa!  Tejada just made a GREEAAATT play to first, rendering the bases loaded no outs moot after two infield grounders that led to force outs at home.  AL squanders chance to win in bottom of 10th in a 3-3 game.  Headline now reads:

“Cook saves National League from Uggla ending” 

Guess I will be using the Simmon running diary mechanism.

So now we are in the 11th.  AL has no position players left.  The fact that the World Series home field advantage rests on the results of this game is rendered even more ludicrous by this development.  Oh, that and the fact that the fans get to elect the 32nd player, so the WS home field could be decided by essentially the 63rd and 64th choices of the voting public.

Maybe the inestimable Christian Guzman can give the NL the lead.  (Wait, Christian Guzman is an All Star?  Oh yeah, each team has to have an All Star — the Major Sports League equivalent of ‘every Little Leaguer gets a trophy.’)

While I sit here and listen to Joe Buck’s diarrhea of the mouth, it got me to thinking.  Sure, McCarver is annoying, but at least he is in his 60s.  How did Buck, who must be at most 40, get to be such a fuddy duddy?

OK, bottom of the 11th — let’s see what happens.

12:15am on the east coast — kids must be loving it; oh wait, they are in bed.

Kinsler just stole second but called out because the tag was close.  Dioner Navarro walks and JD Drew hits what would have been the winning single.  So let’s see if the Bosox or Cubbies will get home field.

OMG, Young singles but Navarro is as slow as JT Snow (see playoff game against Fla Marlins), McClough makes great throw, and Russell Martin makes excellent play on the short hop to tag him out at home.  OK, he was not out, he slid under the tag and when his knee was hit, the foot was on the plate, so the AL gets hosed again.  But in baseball, close is always out.

On to the 12th.  If this goes on much longer, Lincecum will have to get out of his hospital bed to pitch.

Wow, Nate Mclough will be MVP as he beats out his bunt, to add to his legacy from throwing out Navarro.  Interesting, Mariano Rivera almost blows it earlier, but gets the double play.  Uggla makes two errors, then gets a reprieve with great pitching and fielding.  Now he is up with bags full and one out.  Ultimate chance to go from goat to hero.  Let’s return to the action:

Swing and a miss

Strike two looking

Down looking on a wicked 12-6 curveball.  Not the goat, but not the hero either.

Got to admit that I was not even planning on watching this game as I find it boring, but tonight it really is worthy of the name, Midsummer Night’s Classic.

If this goes to the 13th, someone will have to get Joe Buck a glass of warm milk.

Adrian Gonzalez has a chance to hit the second Grand Slam in All Star game history.  The only other being Fred Lynn off of Atlee Hammaker in 1983.  Atlee still in therapy and Fred still the only one to hit a GS.

Not really fair to Cook that he has to pitch yet another inning.  Guillen doubles on first pitch.  Wait for the bunt.  Heartthrob Grady Sizemore is now up. 

Guillen at 3rd with one out.  I walk the next batter, but perhaps that is why I am not a major league manager.  Desperate Third Baseman Eva(n) Longoria is up (yeah, I know that was an easy joke, but i have refrained from all Corey Hart jokes.

Foul ball, but Russell Martin is using a fishing net for a glove — what a play.

Cook fans Longoria — AL still desperate — get it, desperate?  I will be here all week.

Ground out to 3rd.  Do you realize that Christian Guzman never played 3rd in the major leagues?  Guy is playing like an All Star.

13th. (Click link below to read the rest of this entry as I have no idea how long it (and the game) will go.)

Heartthrob David Wright hits a broken bat single fielded by Heartthrob Grady Sizemore.  Let me catch my breath.

OK, Guzman can play third but he cannot bunt. 

Corey Hart — hmmm, the public may want to rethink their selection.  He whiffs! So the World Series will be decided by the household names like Hart, McLough, Ludwick.  I don’t even get the pleasure of writing Fukodome.  Ludwick no can do.  Bottom 13th.

Another interlude — are Fox shows/preview the worst?  OK, I like House, but the rest is a bunch of c-r-a-p.  Oh wait, now we get Michael Strahan on Fox NFL Pregame.  So the roster is:

- Curt Menafee, who is fine, but kind of a poor man’s James Brown (the host, not the Godfather of Soul)

- Terry Bradshaw, who cackles and laughs and cannot do anything but

- Howie Long, whose hair I cannot get past — he seems so cool, but has a 1950s flattop

- Jimmie Johnson, whose hair comes from a mold

- Strahan, who is rather entertaining but is there enough microphone to go around?

This is why I don’t watch these shows.  I go to Yes MSG for all my needed NFL news.

Back to the game.

Good thing I take Flomax; otherwise, I would have to had get off the couch numerous times.

Dan having an Uggla day in the field with his 3rd error (bad hop though so not really fair).

Drew on second, two out, Carlos Quentin at the plate.  Again, may I repeat that Carlos Quentin may decide home field advantage in the World Series.

On to 14th. 

McLough just came five feet from being MVP, but it goes into the scorebook as F9.

Back again.  Webb made Longoria look like a rookie. 

Scott is smooth as Kazmir as Dan goes down looking Uggla.

OK, Terry Francona just won the AL East by pitching Kazmir and Webb throwing just blew it for the D’Backs.  Thank goodness Lincecum is in his hotel — NL West could open for the Giants.

Ahh, Brad Lidge is in – could we have a Pujols moment? Nope, Ludwick makes a great grab.  This game seriously has more excellent plays than any week of baseball.

Navarro back up — he has not missed a lot of burritos, has he?  Burrito or not, he singles.  1st and 2nd with one out.   Drew walks.

Young flies to Hart, and sure enough, 32nd National Leaguer chosen affects the World Series by throwing a bit off line, allowing Morneau to score.  Game over!